“TED” – A DISGUSTING MOVIE

 

 Ted

If ever there was a motion picture that reflects the degradation of the society we now live it, it’s 106 minutes of garbage entitled; “Ted.”

The only reason I remained in chair was to write a short piece as a blog to share my disdain with readers and urge everyone not to spend one nickle to support this picture, and to absolutely prohibit your kids and/or grandkids from seeing it.

I’m happy to report that my sixteen year-old grandson in Asheville told me he attended the movie and walked out at the halfway point, in disgust. Kudos to Aidan Lytle.

Yes, the movie is rated “R” which is supposed to prevent young kids from seeing the movie, but you know how that goes. And when it comes out in DVD rentals, every child from the age of four and up will have an opportunity to view it from the couch, unless some thoughtful parents or guardians do the right thing. Most won’t.

I’m no prude. I write books with smatterings of foul language and some sexual content. Profanity is a part of today’s lexicon. But this was not only over the top, it was totally disgusting.

Mark Wahlberg, an otherwise good actor, plays a young man who grew up with a talking teddy bear, his best buddy with a Boston accent just like him. Teddy is supposed to be the laugh maker who shocks the audience with a constant barrage of “F” words, which precedes every noun as an adjective. His disgusting language is exceeded only by his sexual appetite which goes even further.

What’s disgusting? Let’s start with Mark coming home with his girl, only to find Ted on the couch with four hot chicks. On the floor is a huge pile of human manure, deposited there by one of the chicks as a joke. The frenetic scene is all about who, what and when…and how it will be cleaned up. In the theater, as the teddy bear continues to utter unfunny expletives, young teens are actually laughing and I’m wondering … why? In it’s most broad-minded context, there was nothing funny.

I know I’m over the hill and detached from the youth of today, but not that detached.

In another scene, Ted makes goo-goo eyes at another hot chick and starts flirting by simulating sex… that is, sex in every position imaginable, including oral … followed by squirting hand cream over his face with a pump jar…from which the theater kids howled.

Meanwhile, every other scene (seemingly) depicts the sweet loving teddy bear with Wahlberg smoking pot via the glass bong…having a great time, glorifying drugs, inviting every kid in America to give it a try. Why not?

So, you get the idea.

If this is what Hollywood calls humor in 2012, we have not only reached the slippery slope of morality in America, we are at the edge of the cliff. Mark Wahlberg, an Oscar nominated actor for “The Fighter” should hang his head in shame for signing a contract to play in this movie. Seth MacFarlane, who wrote and directed the film, and was the voice of the despicable teddy bear character, should be banned from the movie making industry.

But that’s not going to happen, because the movie is a box office smash, currently number three in the country, grossing over $123 million thus far…and counting. And look for “Ted 2” in another year, even more repulsive than the first.

Even more amazing than the film itself, are the professional reviewers who lured young people to sit in the seats of this cinematic tragedy by giving it high ratings. Such was the case of several reviewers, including Roger Ebert, who praised the film as the best comedy screenplay of the year.

Ebert’s reviews are as much garbage as the junk movies he praises.

That’s one old man’s opinion.